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BDSM: To make the kiss painful

by Louanne Oatley (2020-01-17)

Is there a limit to human curiosity and greed in regard to pleasures, including erotic? Where can the thirst of the unknown, untested and forbidden lead?

As life shows, it can lead far, and where you find yourself can be very painful and very strange.

The relationships that ordinary couples practice are called vanilla. The term BDSM appeared in the early 90s of the last century, but the phenomenon itself is far from new. The concept of "slave-master", which lies at the heart of BDSM, existed even in the most ancient human society. Later, it began to be used in the form of a kind of game, exacerbating the impression of sexual relationships.

Murals with BDSM elements were found during excavations of Pompeii. In ancient Greece, there was a rite of public flogging of boys in front of the altar of Artemis. The Indian treatise "Kama Sutra" contains a description of love acts with violence.

In Europe, BDSM began to be considered as a special form of sexual behavior only from the second half of the 18th century. Already in those days there were brothels specializing in flogging. The works of the Marquis de Sade and later Leopold von Sacher-Masoch became two sides of the same coin. One gave mankind the concept of "sadism", the other - "masochism". However, despite the fact that these terms are firmly rooted in the vocabulary of psychiatrists and forensic experts, the ideas of these two figures are very far from the ideology of the modern BDSM subculture.

The principle of reasonable sufficiency.

All followers of this sexual genre are required to strictly abide by the principles of SSC (safe, sane, consensual), which regulate the relations of partners and are based on safety, voluntariness and rationality. This is the main difference between BDSM and socially dangerous aggressive or criminal actions. That is, at any moment the session can be terminated - it is worth only one of its participants to say a stop word, or make a stop gesture or movement. As a rule, it is signaled by one who is "below" - that is, a person experiencing the influence of a dominant.

It is not known whether medical indications exist for BDSM practices. But the fact that their apologists must have remarkable health - not only physical, but also mental - is a fact. Hanging on a rack is, you know, not for Klinsky to run. Or you can do without air for quite a long time, because you were visited by an extraordinary desire to feel "slightly" strangled, and a certain thick-nosed nymph sat on your face or squeezes your neck with a rope.

How this fun can end, in details and impressive details was shown in a movie called "Empire of Feelings." The main character, having forgotten, strangles her lover for good, and then, without recollecting herself, cuts off his manhood and with a happy smile starts wandering around Tokyo with him.

BDSM practice involves the use of many tools and devices. From the usual rope and collar with a leash to entire arsenals, borrowed, obviously, from the holy Inquisition. And this requires not only skill, but also strict adherence to safety regulations. Before starting, say, a bondage session, it is strongly recommended that you study a whole set of rules and techniques that exclude life-threatening injuries.

One of the manuals says: "The art of rope requires a lot of attention and caution. If you are a dominant, you must know about the health status of the submissive (servant, slave) - both general and at the time of the session. In particular, you should know if he had injuries and / or operations on his spine and neck; whether he had injuries and / or operations in the shoulder area; Does he suffer from circulatory disorders? Does he suffer from breathing problems? doesn't he have fainting. If this is a woman, check to see if she has any implants in her chest. "

Studying all of these rules, codes, and instructions is masochism in its purest form. And all for what? To become a certified sadist. Such is the mystery of BDSM being.

Find your fetish.

It is wrong to think that every session or every type of interaction between partners ends with sexual intercourse. The main goal, of course, is to obtain psychological and physical pleasure from the actions of the dominant. But for adherents of BDSM, the hormones of pleasure - endorphins - are also produced with the complete exclusion of sexual intercourse. In this case, a whole range of effects can be carried out, which can easily tear down the roof of a simple "vanilla" person.

The fantasy of BDSMers is inexhaustible. Punishment, spanking, infantilism, mummification (tight swaddling in the manner of Tutankhamun), playing a urologist, a proctologist with a hefty enema, as well as a gynecologist who climbed into the patient's vagina to the elbow - all this is far away not a complete list of entertainment. Still - plays with electricity, knives, razors, tying, "horse" and "dog" play and much more.

But do not rush to envy them, because the sexual life of these entertainers is full of real dangers, and the loin, most likely, has a steady blue tint. What is happening in their heads, we just try to guess.

There is no shame in what is permitted.

The human psyche is one of the greatest mysteries. The mechanisms that shape patterns of behavior, including sexual behavior, are not fully understood. What is considered the norm and what is a deviation? Society has long recognized homosexuals and transgender people, it has long been registering same-sex marriage.

As for BDSM, its supporters have an interesting point of view: "In the process of the development of society, relations of domination and slavery began to conquer more and more territories of the human psyche, and only later they began to be used by some as a kind of game that aggravates the impression of sexual relationships. BDSM permeates society through and through, starting with the model of family, school, army, service, and ending with religious dogmas. One word - "Lord" - already says a lot. The long-suffering experience of saints, for example, is closely connected with the concept of BDSM. Of course, by this I am not going to say that every BDSM practitioner is automatically considered a saint. Not at all. Rather, it can be clearly seen from the above that the practice of BDSM covers not only the purely sexual aspects of human existence. "It may sound funny, but the universe itself is one continuous BDSM phenomenon!"

P.S. or the role of cologne.

To understand what BDSM is alive today, you need to take courage and look at the thematic forum. Here, for example, that one young man would like to clarify for himself:

"Hi! Can someone answer me: rub the eggs with cologne - is it harmful to health? And then my girlfriend loves to torment me like that. I don’t mind, but what if it’s dangerous? "

The answer of experts: "Hmm ... 70% alcohol and from 2 to 12% aromatic fragrances. This terrifying torture threatens the baldness of the hairy part of the testicles, and maybe even the tail will fall off. Maybe the girl doesn’t torment you? Maybe she’s saving herself so? "

But - jokes aside. This topic is too deep and serious to be considered in one article. And maybe those who say that each of us has something in common with the followers of this culture are right, because most of us are not against playful slaps and bites, right?

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